Madonna – You Can Dance (1987)

You can dance if you want to, you can leave your friends behind, 'cos your friends don't dance, and if they don't dance, well they're no friends of mine.Cheap Laughs Dept.

…SAID NO-ONE EVER — POP EDITION!

Directions: Using only your smart-assedness and knowledge of classic rock lore, attribute an unlikely quote to a popular musician. Like so…

  • “I’m sorry, if Bill Wyman quits, I quit too,” said Keith Richards. “It’s just not the Rolling Stones without him.”
  • “Favourite Beatles song?” said George Harrison. “Definitely either ‘Komm, Gib Mir Deine Hand’ or ‘Sie Liebt Dich.'”
  • “Thanks, no,” said Keith Moon. “I’ve already had one and I’m driving,”
  • “We should give Mick Taylor writing credit on this one,” said Mick Jagger.
  • “Okay, now it’s time to record one of your songs Artie,” said Paul Simon.
  • “I don’t think it’s quite far out enough,” said Mike Love. “Bring the upside down water cooler bottles much higher in the mix.”
  • “Can we do another take,” said Carlos Santana. “I think I may have overplayed a bit on that last one.”
  • “Eno’s a clever fellow, but he can’t really play anything,” said Bryan Ferry. “What he does, he does very well but it’s necessarily limited music.”*
  • “Turn my amp down for me, will you,” said Richie Blackmore.
  • “Before we start the next number,” said Sid Vicious. “Give me a moment to tune my bass.”
  • “Marijuana’s alright,” said Bob Marley. “But not when I’m working. I need a clear head.”
  • “No, Colonel Parker,” said Elvis Presley.
  • “I think we’ll let the music sell the album,” said Madonna.
  • “I will defer to you on that decision, Rick,” said Roger Waters.
  • “Yes, Mojo, do come in–we’ve much to discuss,” said Van Morrison.

Now you try! It’s fun, it’s easy and it doesn’t cost a penny, only the withering of your already bitter and atrophied heart and the wasting of what precious little time you have left on Earth!

*whoops, Ferry actually did say that.

Editor’s note: I bought You Can Dance when it came out on cassette. An odd bespoke remix/singles hybrid, there is a percussion and keyboard thread that runs thought this segued Lp giving it continuity.

Published in: on February 8, 2013 at 11:07 am  Comments (10)  

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10 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. I want ur vedio

  2. Sorry Million, it’s only words and pictures here at Thrifty V.

  3. how about this:

    “we’re happy to play the old songs for you – not only that, but in the same way they were originally recorded too” said kevin rowland…

  4. or how about this:

    “even though every musician believes that their latest work is their best (or otherwise they may as well give up if they can’t top previous efforts), i am aware you don’t think my new stuff is much cop compared to my back catalogue, so i won’t bother playing that for you when i tour – only the old classics” said david bowie/paul mccartney/bob dylan/add superannuated superstar long-past-their-best of your choice…

  5. or this:

    “i’m not interested in whatever the latest trend is and trying to leap aboard that particular bangwagon despite being twice as old as those doing it already – i know that whatever i do is unique and groundbreaking, and my fans love me for it” said madonna…

  6. ouch! x3

  7. and they keep coming:

    alerting his sound engineer, jimi hendrix remarked: “oh hang on a minute – i think i could lay down a guitar line on this track without recourse to using my distortion pedal”…

  8. You’re a machine.

  9. for a cynic like me it’s like shooting fish in a barrel! i think i’d better stop now…

  10. sorry, i can’t resist one more:

    showaddywaddy lead singer dave bartram stated “as you know, we like to recreate the classic rock ‘n’ roll era down to the last detail, and as it happens i’m just off to the barber’s to get my quiff sharpened up”…


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