SIR PAUL WINS 7-YEAR CAMPAINGN TO RELINQUISH RESPONSIBILITY FOR BROAD STREET Lp
Ageing 1960s rockers have been handed a major moral victory as the European Parliament is set to curtail the artists’ statutory responsibility for recordings they made in the 1980s. Among the very worst music of their careers, albums such as Dirty Work by the Rolling Stones, It’s Hard by the Who, David Bowies’s Never Let Me Down and Give My Regards To Broad Street by Sir Paul McCartney can currently be blamed on their creators for 50 years. New legislation restricts bad reviews to just 30 years meaning that critical maulings of these albums will cease sometime during the next decade. Proposals to completely expunge the albums from critical records and people’s record collections were dismissed as impractical, though a “Guns For Sh*tty Albums” bill has passed initial stages of a New York state assembly lawmaking process.
“Obviously I’m thrilled, you know,” said McCartney at a press conference yesterday. “I mean, what was I thinking redoing those Beatles songs [on Broad Street]? They were never going to have the swing and feel of the originals, were they? And, Jesus, wasn’t the ‘intolerable interference’ I sued the Beatles over because of Phil Spector’s OTT treatment of ‘Long and Winding Road’; then here I go and do the same f*cking thing! And please let’s never mind the movie itself. The words ‘vanity’ and ‘project’ spring readily to mind. Wow.”
“And what about those ridiculous white suits, ugh! I really should have laid off the herbs around ’82,” he added, shaking his head.
Clifford Snoats, rock critic, writing in the Columbus Grauniad, said, “While the four or so new songs on Broad Street are fair to middling, the feeble pun of the title, which is more suited to the Leisure section of the West Briton Post, and terrible cover are enough to dismiss the album outright. As an exercise in pointlessness, it really does take some beating. Only the hardest of hardcore Macca-philes would rate it.”
But others were more forgiving. “It’s not that bad,” argued Kent Beatles fan Eric Weiss, who bought the album at a bootfair while on vacation in Cornwall, UK. “I certainly would want to retain the right to, say, buy the album from a charity shop for a couple pounds.”
“I’ve got a cool book about the movie, too,” said the slightly sad Weiss, “that I’d picked up at another bootfair just a few months before.”
However, Weiss is under no illusions about the intrinsic worth of the album and was quick to pour scorn on Folkestone’s British Heart Foundation for charging £19 for their copy.
“Okay, maybe I’m a glutton, but what kind of stupid eejit is going to pay that?”