VILLAGE GREEN PRESERVATION SOCIETY DISBANDS
Divergent Agendas, Outside Protest Leads To Factionalism
“As much as anything, it was the fierce pro-American stance of those asking God to save Donald Duck that led the Society’s demise.” Raymond Douglass Davies, Chairman VGPS.
(Muswell Hill, London) – And so began the last-ever Village Green Preservation Society press conference.
There are many others in Davies’ camp who believe that, as a quintessentially American icon, Donald Duck is a symbol of the kind of mass-market homogeneity irreconcilable with the stated aims of the parent group.
“Donald Duck, and all who support him, would have a Disney® Store pedalling its Disney® brand trinkets in every medium and large village in England,” said Davies incredulously. “What kind of Orwellean cum dystopian nightmare of a place is that?”
While Davies’ comments regarding the origin of the inter-Society conflict may be debated, there can be no doubt that once the contentiousness started, it spread quickly to the half a dozen factions formally under the VGPS umbrella.
However, many believe that it was Davies’ own hard-line dogma led to the schism.
As Barry Sitzer of The Sherlock Holmes English Speaking Vernacular explained, “If we were debating, say, 19th Century crime fiction and it’s need to be saved, he would always interrupt, saying, ‘Yes, but how will it affect the preservation needs of the Village Green?’”
“Okay, fair enough, preserving the Village Green is the society’s de facto raison d’être,” Sitzer agreed, “but I think the Society should have been a big enough tent to hold everybody.”
The protest organisation has itself been the target of protest groups, only to end up holding the unpleasant end of the publicity stick. Two years ago the offices of the Office Block Persecution Affinity were picketed for three months by the Office Block Workers Society until the OBPA were forced to move to an undisclosed location believed to be near Willesden Green.
Nor was this the only incident of its kind.
The Custard Pie Appreciation Consortium and The Skyscraper Condemnation Affiliate were both asked to terminate warehouse leases after nervous landlords decided the risk of property damage by protesters representing the Concerned Citizens Against Custard Pie and the Tall Buildings Of the World Approval Conglomerate, respectively, was too great.
Davies, however, was unbowed, urging all people to continue preserving Desperate Dan, variety, Dracula, china cups, virginity, as well as the George Cross “and all those who were awarded ‘em.”