The Stories We’re Working On In the Thrifty Vinyl Newsroom

the-register-168-1993-300x191The Stories We’re Working On In the Thrifty Vinyl
Newsroom — It’s All the Music News That Matters

  • Fan Letter Unanswered
  • Franz Ferdinand, Kaiser Chiefs Proud To Continue The Naming-Your-Band-After-WWI-Things Tradition Begun By Sopwith Camel
  • Daft Punk Neither
  • Marshall Electronics To Develop New Amplifiers That Go Up To Twelve 
  • Rolling Stones Purchased By National Trust, Refurbished In Time For Early 2015 Re-Opening
  • Novelty Band Ends Yet Another Fucking Song With “Cha-Cha-Cha”
  • After Death of Lou Reed, Area Man Claims He Is Waldo Jeffers, Was Not Stabbed With Scissors, Had Sex After Mailing Self To Girlfriend
  • Whole Lotta Lenya, a band which covers AC/DC songs in the style of Kurt Weill, admits it only exists for the sake of its nominal pun
  • Our reviewers try to critique the Kinks without using the phrase “quintessentially English”, Jacob Dylan without mentioning his father, Joe Jackson without referring to him as a former “angry young man” or comparing him to Elvis Costello and the new Soul Jazz Studio One compilation without recourse to embarrassing Jamaican patois.
  • Local punk band The Ass-Burger Syndrome breaks up over autistic differences
  • London’s Rinse FM DJ Spends More Time Bigging-Up Various Local Crews Than Playing Music
  • Karaoke Jonathan Richman Technically Much Better Than Original
  • Enya Finally Cracks
  • Air Guitar Amplifier Speaker Pierced As Air Guitar Plunged Through It
  • Nas Releases 4-CD Concept Album Based On Nixon’s Visit To Great Wall of China 
  • Opera Not Over, Despite Previous Understanding Vis-A-Vis Obese Woman 
  • Shy Couple Face Music, Remain Seated
Published in: on November 24, 2014 at 3:26 pm  Comments (5)  

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5 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. i tried to “like” this, but it involved yet another fucking password login, so i didn’t…
    it reminds me of the classic one-off viz comic strip “kenny loggins and his many logins” whereupon the bearded 70’s/80’s AOR singer tries in vain to remember which one of his hit titles he used as a password for a particular website, before smashing his keyboard up in frustration!

    • I’m glad you attempted to like it.

  2. would the algy ward damned bassist spin-off “tank” qualify as a band named after WW1?

    • Sorry Tank is generic, the genre require specific allusions. If you’re starting such a group here are some possibilities: Andy And the ANZACs, The Breast Treaty, Dreadnoughts, The Schlieffen Plans and Lusitania Survivors. There’s no need to pay me, a ‘thank you’ in the liner notes will suffice.

  3. Glad you’re back. (Truly an attempt at a like).

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